Sadly, I'm actually starting to get used to this. Maybe I'm just pumped that there's only one more week of this hellish production period left before I get my life back, but I think that my mind and body have finally grown accustomed to this exhausting mode of living. It took all of two and a half months to get to this point, but I'm feeling pretty good about my mental ability to handle the production side of filmmaking when I do seek to go pro in a year or two. It probably also has helped that I've had a persistent beacon of inspiranity (a hybrid of inspiration and sanity) to get me from week to week. Even so, I'll be glad when I'm writing Wrapped V.7 next week and celebrating the end of what has without a doubt been the most exhausting three months of my life.
Not to veer off into too sentimental a mood, but depite the physical and mental toll that this production period has taken (I'm almost positive that I've aged five years), I'm actually a little glad to have gone through it. As with most things in life, it's always gratifying to put yourself in a challenging situation and see yourself come out in tact at the end. Not only do you learn a lot about yourself and grow in the process, you also inevitably become avid in your search for the next challenge, believing yourself that much stronger for having gone through the most recent one. I think that this cycle has been the central driving force in my life. My adult life at least. Never being satisfied with having accomplished something and always wondering what else there is to be accomplished.
In French New Wave all-star, Eric Rohmer's (pictured above) great film, La Collectionneuse, he infers that the trouble with collectors is that they place little value in each individual item that they procure. The item only has value in respect to the rest of the pieces in the collection. While for the film's protagonist this is a problem (she collects lovers), it sort of seems like life is a lot like this. Each new thing that we accomplish contributes to the aggregate of experience that forms our existence. Life doesn't stop to pat us in the back when we achieve something, so why should we stop to rest on our laurels?
One of my favorite quotes by the incomparable Duke Ellington came when he was asked which of his innumerable outstanding compositions was his favorite, to which he responded, "The one coming tomorrow...always." Duke Ellington folks! Just imagine, the dude wrote "Dimuendo/Crecendo in Blue" and then couldn't wait to get to the next one.
Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself again. I still have a looooooooong week ahead of me. It's just that the light that I see at the end of the tunnel is not only a light of freedom or relaxation, but also a light of more interesting challenges to embark upon. Personal, intellectual, physical, and creative.
Just get me through this week.
Ryan the Sound Guy
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